Have you ever gotten played so much that you thought maybe you had a problem? Maybe you weren’t funny enough or attractive enough or talented enough. Maybe that’s why time and time again, you’ve received nothing but rejection?
As the clock struck twelve one month ago, I got on my knees and recited a prayer of gratitude to my God. At first, I didn’t know what to say. I felt like I owed Him a deep and reflective conversation. Over and over again, I emphatically whispered thank you until I felt like He heard me. I slowly opened my eyes and realized, I really just turned 30 years old. I was alive. As tears formed in the corner of my eyes, I got into bed and drifted to sleep.
You know that feeling you get when you leave the hair salon with freshly styled hair. Your self-esteem is on fleek! There’s not a cloud in the sky, birds seem to be singing a melodic song, people are laughing and carrying along. You look good and no one can steal your joy.
On Friday, I rushed home, ready to take a post work nap, exhausted from the day. I had just gotten a really bad cold and wanted nothing more than to start over. As I pulled up to the driveway, I noticed the front door was wide open. Honestly, I didn’t think too much of it because it happened twice before due to the wind. But I called my mother anyway, inquiring as to who was forgetful enough to do it this time. Never in a million years did I expect to see what I saw next.
I took these shots in December, thinking I was going to write something about restarting for the New Year. That’s not really what I want to write about at all. I want to talk about winning.
The New Year always presents societal pressures to have your entire existence figured out by end of day one. What a daunting task. And yet, if we do not plan, we inevitably plan to fail. So I took a step in the direction of what some people believe will lead to success.
“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.” ― Steve Maraboli
2014 has been a challenging and painful year for a lot of people, myself included. Sometimes, the burdens and responsibilities of life can feel like it’s too much to bear. Whether you’ve been experiencing emotional pain or heartbreak, it’s time to remember that forgiving yourself is of utmost importance. Now, I’m no professional but I know a thing or two about how to heal after hurtful situations. The power to forgive is within us and for us. If forgiveness is something that you struggle with, here’s a practical guide to forgiving yourself.
“I have learned not to worry about love; but to honor its coming with all my heart.”— Alice Walker
The lights grew dim as wristbands began to illuminate the arena. A voice low, yet robust filled the atmosphere. Women excitedly cheered on as they recognized the familiar voice speaking. I could barely hear what she was reciting over the roaring applause. And then, like a vision of a burning sun, she rose from within the stage. We all lost our minds! It took me a second to realize that I was watching Oprah Gail Winfrey walk on the stage. Tears began to well in my eyes as it hit me: I was seeing Oprah in the flesh.