illustrations by Lim Heng Swee
One who has finally learned that it is in the nature of objects to come and go without ceasing, rests in detachment and is no longer subject to suffering. —Ashtavakra Gita
I have a problem: I think I’ve grown attached.
Recently, I found myself lamenting to a friend about being alone. I cried about not having anyone. Yes, I have a few friends, but they have husbands and wives and boyfriends and girlfriends and kids and dogs. That’s the sucky part about growing older. Everyone starts pairing up and you’re just crouched in a corner ripping the crust off of stale bread. Or whatever. Maybe you want what they have, maybe you don’t. All that matters is that you’ve become painfully aware of your aloneness as you mature.
So naturally, you try to find someone or something to attach to. You become attached and you want to do everything with that person. That’s not always possible or logical. So what do you do? You smack yourself in the face and say, “Self, get a grip and grow up.” People are not possessions and situations are not permanent.
A friend suggested I watch this documentary and I’m glad he did. Side note: if you come across a doc you’d think I’d love to watch, shoot me an email! Anyway, although I was hoping it would be longer and a bit more in-depth, I really enjoyed it. Using psychologic research and real life interviews from people across the world, ‘Happy‘ examines the importance of happiness.
“The Constitution only gives people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself.” – Benjamin Franklin
Lessons from the weekend.
Every time I put this book down and pick it back up again, it blows me away. Introspection and self-awareness are critical to me. Reading The Untethered Soul by Michael A. Singer literally agitates my constant ruminations. In a good way.
2013 has been an interesting year. Let me tell it, it was uneventful and unproductive. But that’s not true. A lot has happened over the course of the year.
So yeah, I did a little something something. But here’s what I learned.
A ship in port is safe, but that’s not what ships are built for. – Grace Murray Hopper
I’ve never been big on holidays and Christmas is probably my least favorite. Not because I hate baby Jesus or anything; I just think holidays are different as a single adult. When you’re a kid, you behave all year, anticipating Santa bringing you all the gifts you’ve asked for…
I thought long and hard about what I would do for this Ford Fiesta social activism post. I thought about volunteering or highlighting an entrepreneur’s business. All of those are well and nice things to do, especially during the holidays. Giving back is good for the soul. But as I was getting ready to go, an uneasy feeling made me pause in my tracks.
I decided that I was going to a nursing home yesterday. I was listening to Beyonce’s new album and the track, Pretty Hurts, immediately resonated within me. For the past few days, it was the first song on my mind when I woke up. As I struggled to find something to wear, I realized that I didn’t really want to go. I know, that sounds really horrible.
How can I not want to spend time creating a care package for someone who probably never receives visitors?
Sometimes I think we use charity as a way to feel good about ourselves – to feed our souls. Let me spare this dollar to a homeless person. There, I’ve done my good deed of the day. Or, You really want that sandwich? Don’t worry, I got you. Because I’m just a good person like that. But really, are you a good person? Shouldn’t doing and giving come natural to you? To us?
“Where there is love there is life.” — Mahatma Gandhi
For the longest time, I gave not even an iota of care about what anyone thought of me. But as of late, I’ve mulled and mulled over making certain decisions because I was unsure of what other people would think.
Will I be judged for posting this picture? Is someone going to think I’m conceited? Will they think I’m overly ambitious for pursuing this project? Will what I put out be accepted?
New flash: they probably already think all of the above.
The beauty of life and growth is not allowing what other people think to cripple you. What other people think of you should not stop you from being your genuine self!
One of the most liberating things you can do is accept yourself for who you are at the present moment. Your no college degree having, gap-toothed, over-analytical, wide-hipped, over zealous self. Because when you have love of SELF, the outside forces cannot destroy you.
Sharing your light is what matters. If you’re too concerned with the thoughts of others, how can you share your light? How others perceive you is not your business or your reality.
Random but, I just felt like sharing.