“I have learned not to worry about love; but to honor its coming with all my heart.”— Alice Walker
The lights grew dim as wristbands began to illuminate the arena. A voice low, yet robust filled the atmosphere. Women excitedly cheered on as they recognized the familiar voice speaking. I could barely hear what she was reciting over the roaring applause. And then, like a vision of a burning sun, she rose from within the stage. We all lost our minds! It took me a second to realize that I was watching Oprah Gail Winfrey walk on the stage. Tears began to well in my eyes as it hit me: I was seeing Oprah in the flesh.
“Prayers are prophesies. They are the best predictors of your spiritual future. Who you become is determined by how you pray. Ultimately, the transcript of your prayers becomes the script of your life.” The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson
In 2005, I was 20 years old. I moved off campus and into my own apartment – all 602 square feet of it. I had no living room set, no cable, but it was my cozy home. As the frigid months approached, I realized that I was in way over my head. At the time, I was working part-time at a daycare making $7.25 an hour. I was a full-time college student. I had $1000 a month in bills to pay. I fell into a deep depression that year. Routinely, I would have a pastor friend of mine wake up at 6am and pray for me before I went in to work. Looking back, I know that it was only God that got me through that year.
When most little girls and boys were playing with baby dolls and action figures, I was busy entertaining myself with my board game called The Game of LIFE. Man, I wanted to be a grown up so bad that I was okay settling with the toy version of adulthood. Should I go to college or straight to work? Should I have a family of four or travel the world? Decisions. Decisions. Decisions. And surely, just like in real life, your choices will be affected by the path you choose. That’s just life.
Our real lives are very much like The Game of LIFE, isn’t it? Brimming with twists and turns and uncertainty. Change is indeed scary, but it is necessary for growth. [Read more...]
One who has finally learned that it is in the nature of objects to come and go without ceasing, rests in detachment and is no longer subject to suffering. —Ashtavakra Gita
I have a problem: I think I’ve grown attached.
Recently, I found myself lamenting to a friend about being alone. I cried about not having anyone. Yes, I have a few friends, but they have husbands and wives and boyfriends and girlfriends and kids and dogs. That’s the sucky part about growing older. Everyone starts pairing up and you’re just crouched in a corner ripping the crust off of stale bread. Or whatever. Maybe you want what they have, maybe you don’t. All that matters is that you’ve become painfully aware of your aloneness as you mature.
So naturally, you try to find someone or something to attach to. You become attached and you want to do everything with that person. That’s not always possible or logical. So what do you do? You smack yourself in the face and say, “Self, get a grip and grow up.” People are not possessions and situations are not permanent.
A friend suggested I watch this documentary and I’m glad he did. Side note: if you come across a doc you’d think I’d love to watch, shoot me an email! Anyway, although I was hoping it would be longer and a bit more in-depth, I really enjoyed it. Using psychologic research and real life interviews from people across the world, ‘Happy‘ examines the importance of happiness.
“The Constitution only gives people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself.” – Benjamin Franklin
2013 has been an interesting year. Let me tell it, it was uneventful and unproductive. But that’s not true. A lot has happened over the course of the year.
- I got into two fender benders.
- I went to a few awesome concerts (Solange, Emeli Sande, Foreign Exchange, Lianne La Havas, James Fortune).
- I got my third tattoo.
- I saved $1000 in an emergency fund.
- I went to south beach for the first time.
- I took my blogging life more seriously (so much growth since 2010, 2011 & 2012).
- I bought a camera.
- That one time I completely ruined my clothes.
- I blogged consistently and you guys read.
- I self-hosted my blog.
- I worked serious overtime to pay off one student loan and one credit card amounting to $1867.29 (thank you Lord).
- I saved just about all $2000 for my birthday trip to Thailand next year.
- I got serious about my finances a few months ago and FINALLY began to see a decrease in my student loan debt.
- I partnered with brands for sponsored posts.
- I redesigned my blog a few times.
- Tracee Ellis Ross retweeted me!
- I met Tai Beau.
- I sat in on a photo shoot with Kandi.
- I held my first event.
- I touched Luke James.
- I got my hair straightened FIVE times.
- It rained a lot this year but it resulted in the best sunsets I’ve ever seen in my life.
- I worked my first gig (Music Midtown).
- I went to my first sporting event.
- I flew to a foreign town, rented a car at the airport and traveled alone.
So yeah, I did a little something something. But here’s what I learned.